Obedience vs. “Manners”, the New Jargon

More and more our American society is pushing  anthropomorphism on our pets.  It feels good to use a pretty harness because it is much more “humane” or we buy luxury beds for our pets that cost hundreds of dollars (then our dog chooses to sleep on the floor).  Our pups have elevated car seats so they can see out the window.  We even see costumes for every holiday on the planet.  Dogs are pretty good sports, really, to put up with our fanaticism!  Because they are good sports, we humans tend to think it’s alright.

Of course, I believe that the more we anthropomorphize dogs the worse behaviors we see in dogs.  From my standpoint, doing what I do as a Certified Behavior Consultant, I think dogs are desperately seeking their real identities.  Years ago, a man named William Glasser, M.D. wrote a book called The Identity Society where he talks about people searching for their identities.

I contend that the basis for almost all behavior problems, excepting some genetic temperament, is the result of lack of leadership in a manner that the dog understands.  When we humanize dogs, we increase a dog’s confusion about who he is, thus, I believe dog’s are also searching for their identities because we have led them so far astray from who they are…dogs; a beautiful, loving species different from our own. We no longer honor our dogs for who they are.  

If we think past that, and want to think about it in human terms, how does it feel when someone does not accept you for who you are?  How about a parent that insists you should have grown up to be a lawyer instead of the marine biologist you knew in your inner heart you wanted to become?

Now, not only do websites call dog owners “parents,” they also encourage dog learning in a manner that is unlike natural learning that takes place among the dog kingdom, and ANY species!  We are encouraged to never discipline our dogs because discipline is inhumane.  Well, let us consider that in our HUMAN species, we have rules.  If you speed you get a ticket.  If you break other laws, you may go to jail.  Yet, now many profess that giving a dog only positive reinforcement will create reliable behaviors.  In fact, many don’t even call training, “training” anymore.  Instead of using the word, “obedience” they are using the word “manners.”  Really, is “obedience” an evil word? Or does it help a dog to coexist in our human society?  Does it help our dog to live WITH us? Does it give dogs guidance they desperately need?   If dogs are not encouraged with fair, and meaningful guidance, both encouragement and discipline, how are dogs to know what is acceptable?  A dog with no boundaries will behave in a feral manner.  Can we really afford that in our litigious society?

In a nutshell, honoring our dogs for being dogs is so important.  It is only fair to give them guidance that is meaningful so they can live in our human society without biting or displaying other feral behaviors. But, they are not humans.  Much of the new jargon begs us to treat dogs like humans.  It will only serve to confuse them and create mounds of anxiety for them.  

Caption:  Obedience training, not just “manners” allows us to become closer to our dogs and allows dogs to become incredible helpers to us in society.  Pele is learning public access so she can be my diabetic alert dog.  Other dogs help us apprehend criminals, or detect mines to save soldiers’ lives.