Saturday Night Doggie Cotillion   Part Two

Last week we established two things; first, that a pack remains somewhat consistent throughout the wolf lifespan; and second, that dogs relate to humans like pack members, we can now understand some basic canine behavior.

What that means for our modern domesticated dog is that frequent changes in the social pack are not normal for any canine. While some dogs are more able to cope with accepting new dogs into their social pack structure, others are still trying to overcome their natural instincts and hard wired response to having a consistent pack.  When was the last time you heard of two wolf packs getting together to play games (or dance) together on a Saturday night cotillion?  Never!

We humans expect dogs to simply get along with every dog they meet on the trail, at day care, etc., and to accept those other dogs in a matter of seconds when they don’t even have any idea of where that dog fits into the current social structure. This is enormous pressure for any dog, even the most highly “socialized” dog or puppy.  Thinking back to the wolf pack, the social structure or pack remains for the most part, stable and consistent.  Now we are asking our modern dogs to change the pack structure in a matter of seconds, and to do it with delight.  As a dog behavior consultant and someone passionate about the natural behaviors of dogs, I see this as extremely stressful for the average dog to be able to cope with these demands on an everyday basis.  

We humans are many times at the core of the problem for dogs in their social skills with other dogs

Does that mean I don’t approve of multiple dog households, dog parks, Day Care, or other dog social events? Not at all. But, what I do think is that we as humans need to have realistic expectations about what each individual dog can handle, and to ACCEPT who our individual dog is. Some dogs do thrive on relationships with other dogs, and it is easy for them to cope with the changes in pack structure and social rank. This is, however, usually a lower ranking dog that can make these adjustments easily.

Dogs that are unsure of their social rank in any pack are more stressed by frequent changes and new dogs.  Unfortunately, we humans are incredibly talented in treating dogs like people instead of dogs, so that their personal social rank is very difficult for the dog to define, and to be comfortable with.  

To that end, we humans are many times at the core of the problem for dogs in their social skills. This is why it is imperative that we human dog owners accept the responsibility of treating dogs like dogs, giving them healthy boundaries and social structure.  We need to understand that dogs are not people and should not be treated like little people.  They are not our equals.  In the dog pack, there are no equals. There is always someone higher or lower in social rank.  Always.  When we try to treat them equally to each other, or to us, they become confused and eventually neurotic.

Treating a dog like a dog does not have to be inhumane. We confuse treating a dog like a dog with our fear of being inhumane.  We fear not treating them as equals.  Although a cloud of controversy surrounds the Dominance Theory, we still need to accept that dogs live with social rank in every moment of their lives.  That simply is who they are  I am only stating that in order to be more HUMANE to our dogs, we must treat them like the dogs they are and accept that they are descendants of the wolves. We must accept that not all dogs are able to change pack structure quickly, just like the wolves.

Once we understand that, we move closer to understanding that not all dogs can be social butterflies. Some dogs are further evolved away from innate wolf behaviors than others. When we stop forcing uncomfortable day to day, or minute to minute pack changes on our dogs, we might find that they can better cope with the demands made on a modern domesticated dog. We further need to understand that in a dog’s eyes, we humans are also a part of their pack and their social needs. Not all dogs need multiple dogs in their lives to be happy. A dog can be happy if they are the only dog in your household. YOU are a part of their pack and YOU can influence their happiness by honoring them for the beautiful dogs that they are!

Caption:  It is actually not the norm for dogs to like every dog they meet immediately. They need time to get to know each other, just like we do!